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Mar 30
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Mar 28
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People yearn for relationships they can trust. They want to be able to depend on people. At the deepest level, they want relationships characterized by ease, clarity and harmonious cooperation.
The hallmark of an enlightened partnership is intentional design. Great relationships don’t just happen, mediocre ones do. If you are like most people, you yearn for relationships you can trust. You want to be able to depend on people. You want relationships characterized by ease, clarity and harmonious cooperation. The good news is it is easier than you think. With a little bit of education and skill you can design relationships that foster trust through clarity and agreement.
Clarifying the purpose of your relationship and crafting agreements is a foundational part of the design process for generating trust. The conversations you will have will illuminate what is truly important to each person. This knowledge is essential in creating relationships that work well over the long term.
If you create agreements that reflect the authentic motivation of each person and you plan for predictable breakdowns in a way that fosters accountability you can relax into a new certainty and trust in your most important relationships.
What Is an Agreement?
What is an agreement really? An agreement is a method for coordinating action between two or more people. It is supposed to smooth the way for efficient harmonious interaction. But why do people so often not live up to their word? Usually an agreement fails because it does not reflect the true desire and motivation of all the people making the agreement. People who agree to something because they are afraid of what will happen if they don’t agree, will more than likely not follow through, unless they are pressured to do so.
It’s important to know that agreements alone will not secure the safety and dependability we all yearn for. For an agreement to be effective the internal motivator that drives it should be so compelling that the people involved are aroused to fulfill their part of their own volition. In other words, an agreement you can count on has to come from the right place.
Why Am I Agreeing to This?
That means that each person must answer the question, "For the sake of what am I agreeing to this?" This reason needs to be explicit. You can’t assume the same thing motivates everyone. You have to question, discuss and clarify. Successful agreements are always driven by a clear purpose that inspires action. There are two very important things that need to be part of a process for creating agreements that will work, a clear and inspiring purpose for your agreements and a process for restoring trust when an agreement has been broken.
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Mar 23
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Mar 16
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Mar 14
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The evolutionary edge for humanity is sharing power. As a species we are gradually moving from using our power in self-centered adversarial ways to sharing our collective power for the mutual benefit of everyone concerned. We are shifting form a paradigm characterized by me or them to me and them paradigm. We are just beginning to tap into the power of co-creation.
It’s going to take more than good intentions for us to pull this one off. We are all going to have to learn to think differently, make new distinctions and include new practices in our business-as-usual routines.
We offer you the 5 C’s of co-creation to help you create a map for your exploration of this new and uncharted territory.
The 5 C’s are commitment, communication, cooperation, collaboration and coordination. If you are intending to create a future with one or more people it’s a good idea to deep the 5 C’s in mind and to check in with one another periodically to see if you are taking them into consideration as you progress.
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Mar 09
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Mar 07
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When I was leading seminars and workshops at the beginning of my career in the mid ’70′s I would frequently ask participants to indicate by a show of hands how many were familiar with the notion that our thoughts are creative. Usually no one would raise their hands. And if there were hands raised, they were very few.
Fortunately, many more people have been exposed to that idea simply due to the proliferation of books, audio programs, seminars and workshops that teach that idea. The latest to come along and reach extremely wide exposure is the movie The Secret. Recently Oprah did two shows on the movie and had some of the "stars" of the movie on her show. I read that these two shows had the most viewers of any of her broadcasts.
What The Secret teaches is the very basic principle that our thoughts are creative. That is, what we think about, visualize and dwell upon will come to us through the Law of Attraction.
That’s the theory, anyway.
In practice it isn’t quite that simple. If it was many more of us would be healthy, beautiful, handsome, slim, loved and wealthy – and world peace would have long ago broken out! You see, there is some very crucial information missing from The Secret.
