Creating Powerful Partnerships – Part 1: High Performance Communication
Partnerships are intentional relationships between two or more people who want to create a future together. That future could be anything from a life-long marriage to a business partnership to a short-term project.
We’ve been coaching all kinds of people in consciously creating the kind of relationships they truly want for over 30 years. All too often we see people settle for less than what they really want, unnecessarily. We understand, because that’s what we used to do, too. That is, until we learned the five keys to creating lasting, fulfilling relationships.
People are always asking us, what’s the secret to our long-standing romantic, professional and creative partnership? It seems that being madly in love with the same person for 30+ years is pretty unusual. Especially when so many people are settling for a barely “better than bad” relationship!
We promise that if you use the Five Keys to Powerful Partnerships you will be able to create the kind of relationships you’ve been yearning for.
Partnerships are intentional relationships between two or more people who want to create a future together. That future could be anything from a life-long marriage to a business partnership to a short-term project. Your partnerships are among the most important relationships you will ever have. And, like all relationships, they are vulnerable to misunderstandings, miscommunications, upsets and breakdowns. It’s just that there is often much more at stake in our partnerships.
There are five keys necessary to unlock the potential of your most important relationships, turning them into powerful partnerships. They are:
1. Practicing “high performance” communication
2. Knowing the Five Stages of Relationships
3. Using a “design model” for your relationships
4. Practicing “radical personal responsibility”
5. Using your relationships for your conscious evolution
In this post we will take a look at high performance communication.
Our definition of high performance communication is communication that is honest, compassionate, direct and honors the dignity of everyone involved.
Relationships live in language. That means that the quality of your regular, everyday communication determines the quality of your relationships. Your communication is not just the words you say; it is how you say those words. The result you get in your communication with others is determined by your intention.
Your intention is the superior force in any communication because your intention, conscious or unconscious, is the “carrier wave” for the words. People will usually respond to the energy with which you say something more than the words you say. Powerful communication is congruent, meaning the words you say are consistent with your emotions and your intention.
Another, often overlooked, part of communication is listening. Listening to another with a quiet mind is both a skill and an art. Learning to “tune out” the running commentary inside your head in response to others’ speaking determines whether other people “feel heard” by you.
As the listener, you have the power to influence the quality of a conversation by how you listen. Have you ever been in a conversation in which the person to whom you were speaking was not listening, or thinking about something else entirely – like what they wanted to talk about? How did that make you feel? Have you ever done that with anyone? How would you compare that experience with how it feels to have someone’s complete and undivided attention when you are speaking? How you listen to another can have a direct affect on their self-esteem and their sense of value. The quality of your communication determines whether you feel connected or not.
One of the greatest values of being able to implement high performance communication skills is that you are able to maintain a sense of affinity and caring while having disagreements and misunderstandings. Many people have lost relationships that were precious to them just because they weren’t able to talk through the rough spots. If you want to prevent that from happening to you, it’s a good idea for you to spruce up your communication skills and support the people who are most important to you to do the same.
We have written an entire book about high performance communication called Straight From the Heart. You can learn more about it in our bookstore.
In our next post we’ll go into the five stages of relationships which are predictable, unavoidable and recurrent!
Please share your thoughts and comments!